Soft Life, Boring Life, Peaceful Life, Best Life
Baby, I'm feeling Deja vu
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Affirmation of the week: I will start to enjoy peace instead of questioning it.
Hi, hello, hey, what’s up!!! I hope you guys are having a great week because you deserve it. My emotions are still kinda all over the place and this week has been draining already. Monday, I woke up and had a terrible allergy attack that caused me to then have to do a breathing treatment and this morning I woke up having a panic attack because of a nightmare, so that’s how things are going for me.
I am noticing that how I’m feeling is eerily similar to how I felt last year and if you know anything about how I felt last year around this time, you know things are not going well.
I feel a little lost as to what to do next with my life. I wrote and published the books and I’m like what now? I know I want to be a writer and I feel utterly at peace when it’s just me and words, however, I’m a bit bored of the writer life.
(I know, I’m looking for trouble because I can’t handle peace.)
This led me to today’s newsletter. Why is silence, peace, and stillness in our life, so uncomfortable for us?
The obvious answer is trauma. When we had these small moments of hope, they were quickly ruined, so we spend the rest of our lives always waiting for the other shoe to drop. Or worse, we start to cause chaos because that’s the only way we know how to live.
So what’s the difference between actually living a mundane life versus not being comfortable with things being chill in your life for once?
I feel like when your life has become mundane, you’re just going through the motions of life. This is how you look:
There are no changes in routine, you have nothing to look for, and there are no new projects on the horizon. It’s like you’re clocking into a job, but not doing any work. Staying in this pattern for too long can lead to a depressive episode because you’re not helping your brain make any of the happy chemicals.
Now, when life is peaceful, but it makes you uncomfortable, you still have fun things going on. You feel happy, but you’re always questioning it. You think you should be doing more in order to have this life. You believe that the happiness is not going to last long and there’s just a matter of time before shit hits the fan.
You may even think about or start to self-sabotage because there’s no way someone like you can be happy for a long period of time. You think your life has to constantly be a rollercoaster ride instead of it being a few laps in the lazy river.
Why people self-sabotage and feel like this differs from person to person, but the outcome is always the same: You ruin a good thing.
You question a good partner so much that they leave.
You test a friend too much, so they start to spend less time with you.
You start to make careless mistakes at your easy job.
You are no longer patient with the seeds you have planted and uproot them before they have a chance to sprout.
Whatever it is you do, it’s important that you notice when you get into these moods where you’re ready to burn everything down just because you’re bored with peace. Instead of messing things up, embrace the peace, forget about when it can end, and just enjoy the present.
This week on Kane’s Avenue:
What I’m Listening to:
HISS by Megan Thee Stallion
Not Like Us by Kendrick Lamar
euphoria by Kendrick Lamar
WAP (feat. Megan Thee Stallion) by Cardi B
Not My Fault by Renee Rapp and Megan Thee Stallion
Yeah, I already know what you thinking. Add me on Airbuds.fm so I can see what music you’re listening to.
What I’m Watching:
I Kissed A Boy
Love and Marriage: Huntsville
Grey’s Anatomy
The Quiz With Balls
Bob’s Burgers
Random thoughts/news I have:
I cannot WAIT to see Angel Reese and A’ja Wilson battle it out in the paint in person on Thursday 🤯🤭 I might just die. You’ll read all about it in Kane’s Corner
This month’s edition of Kane’s Corner is going to be so good and juicy like if you’re not a paying subscriber I don’t know what to tell you besides you’re going to miss out on some good stuff!
Didn’t get Sabrina Carpenter tickets during presale, but Imma try again for general sale!
Links:
Your Life, Your Purpose, Your Way is so good that I’m creating a life coaching program based on it.
Sign up for the waitlist of said coaching program if you want me to personally help you get your life together.
feel. forgive. forget. is waiting for you to add her to your bookshelf. get your copy 🌹
Merch is back in stock! Get you a shirt or sticker 🥳
If you use discount code: “pride” on any products from now until July 1st, you get 20% off!
What I learned this week:
Sometimes a boring life is a good life.
Have the week you deserve!
-Avery 💙